Game Review

Metal Slug 3

A mind warping side-strolling game that blows your grey matter to smitherens.

It involves huge phallic water creatures, spewing zombies and genuinenly traumatising rotating alien abominations (see below).

The dime arcade graphics may put some of you off, but oity-toity developed graphics wouldn't gel well with the shear brain-scratching anarchy unleashed on screen.

Grand Theft Auto : San Andreas

Would it be too emotionally traumatising to declare that after an initial shoot-em-up rampage involving tanks, rocket launches, flame throwers, ladies of the night and industrial strength explosions, I spent most of the time clocking in cab fares to the sweet tunes of mother lovin' southern state rock.

Overall opinion: Addicting as crack cocaine.

Why I stopped playing: Developed a vague outline of a social life. And more importantly, I used the gimp suit cheat.
It turns out there's only so much of a man strolling around in a gimp suit, semi automatic in hand, you can take.